There's no greater love than this

Hey. I'm gonna write my first real blog in a long time.
I was reading this chapter in John...John 17. And all it is is Jesus talking to God. Which I think is really cool.
And in the pre-passage message of my devotional, Max Lucado wrote "Once upon a tree, a Creator gave His life for creation."
And like, I know that, but somehow, the revelation's gotten deeper for me lately. You know that one song that's like "I would take a bullet fooorr you" as in Jesus? It's kind of like, "Really? Only a bullet? C'mon."
And I talked about this in my Easter post. About how he carried the cross the whole way. But. Just hear me out and humor me.
Jesus could've just died. He could've been shot (aside from the fact that they didn't have guns), he could've just been be-headed...but no. He was whipped, beaten, carried a cross for longer than I can probably run, and hung on a cross with metal driven through his flesh. He could've just done it. Gotten through it. But He didn't. He suffered, He cried, He was in agony, and He finally died.
Whenever I watch The Passion of the Christ, I'm just like "C'mon, Jesus, just die already!" And by just die already, I mean I cant bear to watch Him suffer. And it's because I think "Jesus, I'm not worth it. I'm not worth the pain." I don't know if I'm the only one who feels this way. Jesus, I'm not worth it. You, who was flawless and without sin, dying for me, who has done so much not to deserve it. To deserve You.
The other day in choir, Ms. Milli was talking about the same thing. She said when the enemy comes and says "You can't do anything. You're a failure. You're no superhero" and I say "Yes, you're right," Jesus says "No. You're worth every second of suffering. You're my superhero."
Just to think....that Jesus puts me above Himself. He thinks I'm better than life itself.
I deserved death. I still do. And He didn't have to take it for me....but He did.

And that is true love.

Love,
Leah