Gosh, I hate the term worry-wart (mostly because warts are gross, ew)...but it sometimes describes me perfectly. And I hate it. When everything seems to push me at the same time, I worry about things that are completely beyond my control, then I get all irritable and it always ends in a puddle of tears. As much as I love crying, I don't.
I have to be constantly reminded that everything is beyond my control and will work for good, no matter how deep the pit or how dark the cave. And when I say constantly, I mean like 10,000,000 times a day. At least I'm aware of it, right?
I'm sorry for the really short posts lately. Just little tidbits for y'all.
Worrying is no way to solve anything! I'd give you a bible verse about worry, but there's like a bajillion of them. So. Maybe some other time.
Official countdown to ORU is 11 days, for all the people who seem to ask. Worried, terrified, excited...you know. That's me.
Leah
7.19.2011
And You are God, forever You will reign.
Church camp is ten days away, and I'm absolutely STOKED. And I only use the word stoked when I'm really excited, because I sound like I should be carrying a longboard around. Anyway. I think God creates a spirit of expectancy in myself (I don't know about everybody else) before these camps...but this year feels different. It's been spoken prophetically that this camp would start a revolution, and I fully believe it. I may not be there for this revolution or be a big part of the development, but I love knowing that God has placed me as the kindling to get it going.
I was just reading up on Hillsong United (the band, if you don't know them, LOOK THEM UP!) and read about how they started the actual band after a summer camp revival in 1998. And I'm feelin it. 2011 will be the new 1998, and I'm so excited.
I can't imagine how God's spirit will move, but that just gets me more ecstatic!
Sorry this post is so short, but I just had to vent my excitement! EEP! Pray for us and that we will see His miraculous power!
Leah
I was just reading up on Hillsong United (the band, if you don't know them, LOOK THEM UP!) and read about how they started the actual band after a summer camp revival in 1998. And I'm feelin it. 2011 will be the new 1998, and I'm so excited.
I can't imagine how God's spirit will move, but that just gets me more ecstatic!
Sorry this post is so short, but I just had to vent my excitement! EEP! Pray for us and that we will see His miraculous power!
Leah
7.15.2011
Caught Up in Grace Like An Avalanche
Take my life, Take all that I am
With all that I am, I will love you.
Take my heart, Take all that I am,
Jesus, how I adore You.
So, if we are friends on facebook or you follow me on twitter (by the way, @lovelyuhhh), you know my whole struggle in finding a roommate and the stress and pain it's caused me. Basically, I had a room, then was kinda forced out of it, leaving me without a room for two or three weeks. And it has only REALLY stressed me out for the past two or three days, since I realized that there were no rooms left. I would check back four or five times a day, and still to no avail.
If you ever wanna stress yourself out, go to college. Legit.
Yesterday during prayer, "Awesome God" came on. And if you've even heard of the word "Church," you know the song "Awesome God" like you wrote it yourself.
You know.
"Our God is an awesome God
He reigns from Heaven above
with wisdom, power, and love
Our God is an awesome God"
And I just got stuck on wisdom. And I was directed right back to the purpose of my whole expedition to ORU. I had one of those mind-conversations with God.
"Is it to live and have a roommate? Is it to have loans? I mean, yeah, you're going to have all of them, but is that the core reason you're doing all this, just to do it?"
"Well, no. It's not."
"And what is?" (Like the all knowing Parent he is!)
"Worship."
I've allowed myself to be caught up in confusion, complication, and worrying. I've tried to work it out on my own and haven't had the right focus. So yesterday, I just told Him I was gonna let it go. Worrying won't the outcome be any better, so why do it?
And you know what happened today? I did my routine check of the housing website, and there were two rooms open. One, 812, with a girl already living in it. Then there was 813, a completely empty room. You better believe I was the first occupant of 813. And now, a girl named Jaymi has reserved the room too.
So, if you could, fellow bloggers (and my lovers), please pray that I LOVE this girl and everything works out.
I guess my long-winded lesson of this blog post is...re-focus. Like Pastor Nate talked about. Choose to focus not on the drama and complications, but on your passion for worship. Not on the difficulty of your life, but your eternal reward. Not the people that continually disappoint us, but on Jesus himself!
Love you guys. Have a good day =)
Leah
With all that I am, I will love you.
Take my heart, Take all that I am,
Jesus, how I adore You.
So, if we are friends on facebook or you follow me on twitter (by the way, @lovelyuhhh), you know my whole struggle in finding a roommate and the stress and pain it's caused me. Basically, I had a room, then was kinda forced out of it, leaving me without a room for two or three weeks. And it has only REALLY stressed me out for the past two or three days, since I realized that there were no rooms left. I would check back four or five times a day, and still to no avail.
If you ever wanna stress yourself out, go to college. Legit.
Yesterday during prayer, "Awesome God" came on. And if you've even heard of the word "Church," you know the song "Awesome God" like you wrote it yourself.
You know.
"Our God is an awesome God
He reigns from Heaven above
with wisdom, power, and love
Our God is an awesome God"
And I just got stuck on wisdom. And I was directed right back to the purpose of my whole expedition to ORU. I had one of those mind-conversations with God.
"Is it to live and have a roommate? Is it to have loans? I mean, yeah, you're going to have all of them, but is that the core reason you're doing all this, just to do it?"
"Well, no. It's not."
"And what is?" (Like the all knowing Parent he is!)
"Worship."
I've allowed myself to be caught up in confusion, complication, and worrying. I've tried to work it out on my own and haven't had the right focus. So yesterday, I just told Him I was gonna let it go. Worrying won't the outcome be any better, so why do it?
And you know what happened today? I did my routine check of the housing website, and there were two rooms open. One, 812, with a girl already living in it. Then there was 813, a completely empty room. You better believe I was the first occupant of 813. And now, a girl named Jaymi has reserved the room too.
So, if you could, fellow bloggers (and my lovers), please pray that I LOVE this girl and everything works out.
I guess my long-winded lesson of this blog post is...re-focus. Like Pastor Nate talked about. Choose to focus not on the drama and complications, but on your passion for worship. Not on the difficulty of your life, but your eternal reward. Not the people that continually disappoint us, but on Jesus himself!
Love you guys. Have a good day =)
Leah
7.10.2011
And Then There Were None
"Like some days you might say something stupid, and that's the part of you that's still ten.
Or maybe some days you might need to sit on your mama's lap because you're scared,
and that's the part of you that's five. And maybe one day when you're all grown up maybe
you will need to cry like if you're three, and that's okay. That's what I tell Mama when
she's sad and needs to cry. Maybe she's feeling three"
I never know what to say anymore. I'm eighteen and well on my way to flying the coop, and I still feel like a fourteen year old having nightmares about my first day of high school. It's scary. And as much as people tell me that I'm ready for this shift in seasons, I'm not. I don't think I ever am. Discomfort is where God has free reign, and I guess what scares me is that if He has full reign, I don't have any. At all.
It's kind of like, you know, when you're riding your bike down a steep hill, and you keep picking up speed...and more speed, and even more until you're holding on for dear life and thinking about which bandaids you'll be picking out in a few minutes. That's how I feel. Picking up that kinda speed is exhilarating, but holy crap if I don't pee my pants, I don't know what'll happen!
I guess this is me just expressing my thoughts. The stupid part of me that's still 14. And that's okay.
Or maybe some days you might need to sit on your mama's lap because you're scared,
and that's the part of you that's five. And maybe one day when you're all grown up maybe
you will need to cry like if you're three, and that's okay. That's what I tell Mama when
she's sad and needs to cry. Maybe she's feeling three"
I never know what to say anymore. I'm eighteen and well on my way to flying the coop, and I still feel like a fourteen year old having nightmares about my first day of high school. It's scary. And as much as people tell me that I'm ready for this shift in seasons, I'm not. I don't think I ever am. Discomfort is where God has free reign, and I guess what scares me is that if He has full reign, I don't have any. At all.
It's kind of like, you know, when you're riding your bike down a steep hill, and you keep picking up speed...and more speed, and even more until you're holding on for dear life and thinking about which bandaids you'll be picking out in a few minutes. That's how I feel. Picking up that kinda speed is exhilarating, but holy crap if I don't pee my pants, I don't know what'll happen!
I guess this is me just expressing my thoughts. The stupid part of me that's still 14. And that's okay.
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