I've got a sneaking suspicion / that hindsight only favors good vision

Anybody notice the new format? Eh? Eh? Like it?
Well, too bad. It was a dicken to change. And I'm also thinking about changing the title to Elevation. Tell me what you think of this idea.

So, I started this uber (german, eh eh?) long blog on Peter 1:6 yesterday.
But I decided that's not what everybody needs to hear right now. Or at least, that's not what I need to write about. Mainly the part about me needing to write something.

Relationships.

Groan.

This is what's being thrown at me. And I'm trying to catch one after the other, until the point where I just drop them all.
It seems like I can't please one person without disappointing another.
My friend Anah (who just started following my tweets hooray!) asked me something today.
She said "So have any guys? How many? Eh Leah? Eh eh?"
and without thinking, I replied "Too many"
Thinking back on this, I find it rather hilarious.
When in reality, I have just enough. But the thing is, I'm not used to it. For the past...mmm....15 ish years, I'm not one that guys drool over. And by gosh, I'm SO glad. I know a few girls that have never had a boyfriend by 16. Some of them are realizing how blessed they are, that God is keeping them from that. It makes our "One" seem that much more special. Nobody wants to be handed a half eaten cake with a muttered "happy birthday".
You want that entire cake, you want that happy birthday to be practically screamed at you, and you want it all. You want it now.
I just thought of a Queen lyric. Needless to say I won't write it, because you better already know which one I'm talking about.
Just kidding about the wanting it now. But it's like...opening your presents on Christmas! Having a surprise party that was ACTUALLY a surprise.
It's just that much better to wait.
Anyway. Back to what I was saying. I can carry these relationships. I lose the ones that need to be lost, and I gain the ones that need to be gained. I need the people I need to meet, I say goodbye to the people that leave.
These things will never change. They just won't. I'm growing to accept this...and I'm trying to teach a friend of mine to do the same. It's hard to do, especially in...eerrmm...advanced relationships. Does that sound like some kinda practical arts high school class? That's what I thought.
But what I'm talking about is being dumped. It sucks to have the thought that God put you through the heartbreak, but He did. But he's right there with you!
And you know the line "It's not you, it's me?"
It's pretty much completely true...except that it's nobody. It's God. There's a heart shaped box, and it can only be filled with a heart. Some things may come close to fitting, but in the end, only one will fit PERFECTLY.
Same with every other relationship. You know those little plastic squares that have all the hole shapes in it that little kids play with?
little side note...even as a teenager, these things are fun to race with. Me and Elijah tried it. It's definitely harder than it looks.
anyway. There's a hole for every shape. Once a shape fits through it, no other shape will. They make look similar and ALMOST fit, but they won't.

And so that is my resolution. Referring to children's toys.
Another thing that I've realized along with this...I've been saying (mostly to one person) is that only she and God know EXACTLY how she's feeling.
Like you know how people say "I know EXACTLY how you feel"
Well, no ya don't.
I had to write a timed write on which character's reality was the most real in 1984. I came to the conclusion that we have no idea, because each character's reality is only real to them. Does that make sense? Nobody knows how you feel, because nobody's you. They've never been you, and they'll never be you! Crazy, right? I know.
Again, my train of thought is CRAZY. Mrs. O'Connell was probably like "What the heck is she talking about???"
Well, she'll grow to understand.

my random bullet:

• It takes 147 licks to get to the center of a tootsie pop. They had a study at some college.

anyway. Adios, Lovelies.

-LL
31. Win a contest of some importance.(aside from multiple limbo contests)
32. Drink a monster. (I have never done this before. But seeing as caffeine has a bad effect on me, I might wanna reconsider this one)